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My neighborhood has been invaded by a troop of little bay-bay kids.  (You know the ones that dont die, they multiply.)  A whole lil gang of em.
One thing I cherish about this neighborhood, compared to my last is the minimal amount of little screaming kids…….my block is full of older people…….older people are quiet.  I get enough noise out of the fraternity boys to fill the evening air on a regular basis….  At the old place there were about 3 families on the block that had small kids that they never knew where they were at…….they were generally somewhere breaking windows out of abandoned houses, tormenting neighborhood dogs and cats and/or vandalizing cars.  (Elementary school age kids, not older kids.)  I remember when all of them collectively had chicken pox.  They were still out roaming the streets…..I guess infecting the better part of the neighborhood with itchy red bumps and high fevers.  These kids would be out till after 1:00 AM on school nights……One night I caught them creeping around the back of my house so I turned on the hose and doused them all with cold water……they ran home as fast as their little legs would carry them.
I noticed my new bay-bay kids last week one day when they were in the alley behind my house tormenting Oreo.  They had a stick poking it thru the fence screaming "Shut up stupid dog" while be barked and wagged his tail.  (ever the guard dog)  They were so busy messing with the dog, they never even glanced up at me as I examined their shoeless, kool-aid stained t-shirt wearing selves.  Only one child was completely dressed, the others had on only pampers and shirts…….. I glanced both ways down the alley, one direction is the frat boys house, (they obviously don’t belong down there unless the boys started a child care business) the other direction has a row of 4 unkempt old houses.  They evidently moved into the first one, closest to my house.  (Joy)  I yelled for them to leave the dog alone and go home…..they did as requested. 
I have a small patch of trees behind my house that the 3 legged cat lived in before he adopted us.  This patch of trees seems all too interesting for these kids…….the problem is they are all so little.  Really little…and out there alone….I would say the oldest one is 7 (and there are 5 or 6 of them) so during the day the 3 smallest ones are out alone, playing just feet from a very busy 3 lane street.  These kids are outside 24/7 doing all sorts of random stuff and marching up and down the alley… alone.  It makes my skin crawl….what a perfect place for a pervert to snatch one of them.  I have sat outside on my back porch for an entire hour during lunch and not one time did an adult come out of the house to check on them……I even sat and watched as one of them (a little boy) climbed up on top of his Mom’s car, pulled his "little horse out of the barn" and pissed in the wind……2 babies in diapers stood and watched…..Taryn and I looked at each other and shook our heads in disbelief. 
Yesterday I noticed this large brown pit bull loose in the same patch of trees……the bay-bay kids were out in the trees trying unsuccessfully to pull a large branch from an extremely old, large tree…..the dog goes whizzing past them, my dogs notice him and start barking like a pack of wild hyenas.  The pit immediately comes into the alley, hair and tail straight up……he pissed on the telephone pole and as he turned to kick dirt into the air I noticed he was intact.  I kept calling my dogs till they all came back in…….he wasn’t overly aggressive with the dogs but I was concerned for the kids till he trotted past them as if they weren’t there while the little bay-bays all screamed and ran.  I am now looking to see where the dog came from because an unknown visitor raided my trash that was set out after Easter……my child that saw him said the dog looked like Tonka…..I think  this was my cultrate.  He looks just like her. 
Three houses down stand 3 women, one young man and a 20 something man all looking at me, looking at them.  I was on the phone with someone from work and still trying to figure out where the dog came from.  I guess they noticed and started doing these big hand motions like, "What?   What you lookin at?  Wanna fight?"  The pit was zooming all over the place so I never could tell where he ended up. 
Standing there a while longer, just to tournament the "wanna fight" people I took a long look at them…….they look like they just rolled out of a dive trailer park somewhere…..the guy looked something like Eminem and the girls looked…well…trashy. 
Today while out on the back porch reading I got a better look at one of the "wanna fight" folks.  This was the young man, he was riding one of those stupid little motorcycle things that looks like a tiny Harley (cute for kids but STUPID for grown folks) he had on no shirt, cut off jeans, sneakers with no socks…..he had a huge lump on his forehead and ears that protruded straight out and he was noticeably dirty.  I gave him a friendly smile as he passed (yes I forced one out) and he just shot me a dirty look.  He looked (for lack of a better term) inbreed.
A couple of the dogs are seriously wound up every time one of those little bikes or a moped pass by the house…….they run up and down the fence like they are crazy and I guess he found that funny so he decided to go up and down the street repeatedly next to my house, laughing looking at the dogs as he taunted them.  This pissed me off so I stood up and engaged him in a dirty look then called in my dogs…..He grew tired of the performance with no audience so he went back home…..looking back at me….
I have now decided I am going to ready a row of tack strips for his next performance for my dogs……(just kidding….but still not a bad idea)
Im still working on an idea for the bay-bay kids……(I do have a couple words for the Mom though….)  Some people shouldnt breed.


  1. I totally agree with you on that one.  Unfortunately I’m still waiting for them to push human sterilization through congress.  Some constitutional rights or some such thing.  Jeesh

  2. Man Laura,My eyes are getting too old for this,LOL.My new laser mouse has a magnifier so I used it,otherwise I couldn’t have read this.Even then the font hurt my eyes.Sorry to hear the nieghborhood has gotten less than peaceful.I don’t have any advice,except that these type of peaple rarely stay in one place for long,they will get behind on rent or otherwise get evicted for something sooner or later.

  3. Ugg!  I know EXACTLY what you mean!  I wonder how those parents
    don’t get in some sort of trouble.  Don’t they care what their kids are
    doing?  How sad.
    About the pit bull…They have passed this new law regarding pits where I
    live.  I think it’s overkill, but people who don’t want to abide by it are
    just dumping their pits everywhere.  It’s a mess!

  4. ARG—the people that give the word "Neighboor" a bad name.
    On another note– I love the picture of Murphy with one of the girls where he’s putting his paw on her.  "My human" he seems to be saying.
    There’s nothing in the world quite like being claimed by an animal as their own.

  5. What about a random anonymous call to Child Protection Services???

  6. The poor kids! Those stupid "parents".  Maybe Alicia has the idea?

  7. HEY!

  8. Oops, posted my comment under the wrong entry.
    Must not have had enough coffee today.

  9. Laura-
    You said it best: Some people shouldn’t breed. I live in a neighborhood full of White Trash, Ganstas, Gangsta Wannabes, and other assorted misfits (me). Those stupid "pocket rockets" are one of the biggest annoyances. The other is that lazy, shiftless tax burdens keep procreating. Local clinics give out condoms for next to nothing, but you would never know it.
    (Conservatives and easily-offended people quit reading here.)
    It was not all that long ago that Nature took her course with those that could not keep up with the rest of the herd. Not anymore. Science and Human Rights have superseded that. Welcome to the "obverse" of an otherwise good coin. This is one of the few reasons abortion should never be made illegal, though it is not a good choice. If we’re lucky, one or all of the "bay bay" kids and their parents will qualify for the Darwin Awards.
    Teach your dogs to go for the crotch…
    (That being stated, I realize at least one person "out there" would quicky nominate ME for such a "distinction." You know what they say about opinions…)

  10. Ew.  That story painted a clear picture of the neighbors.  Sorry you have to deal with them all. 

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